My Name is Matthew, and I am a soldier. I have an interesting view that I share from time to time with the folks I encounter as I walk the road. Some of those people have encouraged me to seek out ways to help others or simply share my views or ideas with more people. I will blog on many subjects, from things that piss me off on a daily basis to more important issues such as dealing with chronic depression and the struggles that ensue as a result. I will be taking bits and pieces from emails and rants that I have verbalized as well, so if you see something we have talked about please, smile and nod...Thanks for reading.

Saturday, February 8, 2014


       I know that we live in a day and age where words are flippantly used. I accept this, and do my best to use words properly but even I screw up sometimes. People swear, and that doesn't help the problem. When I say I'm having a *explicit four letter word* day, what I probably SHOULD say is "My day isn't going the way I want it to and I'm feeling a little lousy about it". That would take too much time though, so like everyone out there I swear sometimes. That isn't the point of this post but it does supply ammunition for my point.

        How many times a day do you hear people using the word "Love"? I overheard someone the other day say "I LOVE my cell phone!” Now I'm not knocking the tech, that's not what I'm trying to do. I'm not saying that the man doesn't appreciate his equipment. That's not what I'm doing either. What I am saying is that when I look my significant other in the eyes and profess my love for her that I am describing an emotion that I could NEVER feel for a cell phone. I am attempting to describe a deeper connection than the one that the local cell tower offers my phone. I am trying to say to her that she means more to me than my $65 dollar a month bill.

          I heard a talk recently on I don't remember exactly the man's name but he was describing depression. He said that the opposite of depression is Vitality. That word means a huge concept. Vitality is the power of something to be lively. I have felt vitality after expressing love for my significant other. I have felt vitality after having a particularly satisfying exercise routine. I have felt revitalized after waking up from a long night's rest and my alarm clock was NOT the thing that woke me up but a kiss, from my Woman. So I'm in the bathroom after hearing this speech on depression and how it's vitality that is the opposite of depression and what do I see? In my shower, like most men I'd wager, I have a shower gel that I bathe with. In clear print on the bottle it says "Revitalizing shower gel". My heart sank. I have been to the field for weeks at a time where, upon returning home I needed a hot shower and indeed I felt revitalized after taking one. HOWEVER, I have never thought that my shower gel was the thing that revitalized me. I have had sore bones and muscles and felt revitalized after a massage. Though, I can't say I ever felt revitalized by a bathroom product.

        Agonizing how I get to my point I know, sorry, I think that we abuse the language day in and day out and it is our responsibility as people to ensure that if we know better, we should do something about it. I was in the store one day and I dropped my change. Instead of cursing, as I was normally inclined to do, there were children present. I said "Four letter words" out loud. The woman in line behind me with the children started to laugh. "WOW, I haven't heard someone say THAT before". I was in a goofy mood so I responded "Ma'am I'm sorry but I don't think its right to swear in front of children and I sometimes say 'four letter words' instead of swearing". This is an example of how we as adults can change the perception and the language that is being abused day in and day out. Many of you out there are writers. We have the vocabulary! The words aren't hiding; we know how to express ourselves.

        I just know that my opinion is that we use words too flippantly. We say "love" when we mean "Gosh I like how my cell phone meets my needs". We say "love" to our significant other when what we mean is "Woman, you make my heart skip a beat when I see you smile, you know that?" We say "love" when we mean "Mom, you are an amazing woman and I appreciate what you have done for me and what you do every day". We say "revitalized" when we mean "this stuff smells good and takes the funk off my skin too? AWESOME!”

         If you read this post and you have said something to yourself like "Gosh, he has a point". Please say so. If not you can say "Matthew, shut up!" Either way, I'm going to keep posting because to me... THIS isn't a blog or a chance to be heard. To ME this is therapy. Thanks for reading!



  1. Hey you have a point!! Although I would LOVE to have your cell phone bill instead of mine. Just kidding. There are so many words out there we could take apart like this!

  2. AT&T pre paid. Best service on post for me. Also the cheapest. Yes, I have a post on four letter words, you will enjoy that one. Luck to you, thanks for the comment!